The gown is tucked away in a closet somewhere, the flowers are dry, the thank-you cards are written. I hugged my housemates goodbye after our final camping adventure. I said goodbye to Messiah, SoJo, and the important people I loved from both.
Then I moved all of my belongings back to my parents’ home in New Jersey, where I am now. It’s been a week and it feels okay to be here -- it always feels good to have days to myself, sleep deeply, have a place to store things I can’t carry on my back, read mindless books, write, and garden. I feel less and less like I need to accomplish things lately. I just want to be and appreciate these rare days of nothing spectacular. Highlights: discovery of Yerba Mate, a meaningful trip to Ellis Island, and making plans with Pam on gum wrappers and napkins.
Notions of home feel funny, “settled” is a word that feels awkward in my mouth, ideas about being in a single place for very long feels disappointing. I’m finding my feet again. Transitions always send me whirling for a bit, but they come often enough that I understand it’s a stepping stone to finding another place, another community, another home. If I had a GPS, it might say “recalculating”. And I've learned to appreciate the recalculations.
While I take my time recalculating, I’ll be on the road for a bit: a silent retreat this week in Maryland, time at Spruce Lake for dear friends Elyse and Jeff’s wedding, a road trip down south to visit Koinonia Farms, a move to Harrisburg, a road trip up to Maine for another wedding, and then another road trip up to New Hampshire for another wedding.
I am comfortable to resume my position of wanderer for a while, at least. I will see you when I see you. Till then-- peace in abundance.
